It's Complicated
by oncerforlifeig
Summary: SwanQueen AU, no curse, The Swan-Mills family lives in New York where their meddling parents are always trying to tell them how to raise their only son, Henry. The story is told through Henry's eyes.
1. Introductions

I've always been told that if true love were easy then we'd all have it.

Well, from watching my parents, I can definitely say in all honesty, they are in love.

Not to mention they went through hell and back just to be together, but now that they are, I can tell that they are truly happy.

And so am I, it's a privelege to watch your parents be in love.

Not many people get that chance and I certainly don't take it for granted.

Oh!

I should probably introduce myself to you.

You're probably thinking, 'Well who is this random person going on and on about his lovey dovey parents and what not'.

My name is Henry Swan-Mills, and my parents are Emma Swan-Mills and Regina Swan-Mills.

And _yes_, the hyphen _is_ necessary, unless you want to piss my moms off.

Take it from me, that isn't a good idea.

I guess you're wondering why the title of this story is 'It's Complicated'.

Two words: My grandparents.

I have three of them, my grandmother Cora, she's Regina's mom.

And grandma Mary-Margaret and grandpa David, they're Emma's parents.

They're always trying to give my moms advice on how to raise me and how to have a stable relationship.

We all live in the wonderful, loud, busy city of New York.

It's quite the life if you ask me.

Every morning I wake up to the smell of breakfast coming from the kitchen and I'm always greeted with a smile and kiss from my mom Regina, just so there's no confusion we'll call her mom.

Then my other mom Emma, we'll call her momma just because she always gives me a smirk when I do, never fails to ruffle my bed head before sitting down at the table next to me as we indulge in the breakfast mom cooked.

Sometimes momma would cook breakfast but ever since that small incident where a few dish towels caught on fire, mom insisted on cooking the meals.

Every once in a blue moon mom will let momma cook for us but she has to be supervised, it's kinda funny.

They're both the greatest parents a kid like me could ask for and I felt like I should share our life with the world by writing about us, so here goes nothing.

Today was the first day of summer and I couldn't wait to sleep in until noon everyday and watch cartoons in my pajamas while the house is empty.

Or so I thought.

It was 7 a.m. when someone burst the door to my room open, it was still dark in my room so I couldn't see who it was.

"Wake up Henry! You're going to be late for school!"

I recognized the voice almost instantly.

_Mom_.

If you could've seen my face, you'd understand why I said what I said next.

I sat up in my bed and grabbed my pillow, "Mom! IT. IS.** SUMMER!** Now please get out of my room!"

And like a fool, I threw my pillow at her.

Why did I do that?

I must've had a death wish because I could've sworn I saw her head spin when the pillow hit her.

I thought she was about to spit up green goo, like that movie The Exorcist, but luckily she didn't.

She just picked the pillow up and slowly walked over to me.

Meanwhile I'm silently praying that I live to see my next birthday,

"Henry…."

Oh God Henry, don't say anything.

Don't reply.

It's a trick, just pretend to be asleep.

Maybe she'll leave…

"I know you're still awake."

Crap!

Okay Henry, think!

Sleep walking!

No.

Mom's not dumb enough to fall for that, maybe momma but not mom.

It suddenly got really quiet, and I felt my pillow smack me in the face.

I just laid perfectly still, "Next time you try that, I'll send you to stay with your grandmother for half the summer!"

Oh no, not with grandma Cora.

Her apartment smelled like moth balls and mint.

And she doesn't have wifi…Who doesn't have wifi?!

But thank you God, she let me off with a warning.

As I heard her foot steps trail down the hall, my room became silent once more and I could resume my peaceful slumber.

I grabbed my pillow and cuddled it, quickly falling back to sleep.

Like I originally planned, I woke up a little after noon and the house was empty.

Mom was at work, she's the mayor of New York, and momma is a cop.

Sometimes I worry about my momma being out there in dangerous situations but she always tells me, _"We all have a purpose in this life and mine is to protect. I have to keep this city safe for you and mom."_

I know mom worries a lot about her too but she tries not to show it.

At least not around me.

I walked into the living room after grabbing the whole box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch and the gallon of milk when I noticed a piece of paper taped to the TV.

They knew this was the best way to make sure I read the note.

My mothers know me so well, it's actually weird at times.

As I read the note, the handwriting was a bit sloppy.

_Momma._

"_Kid, mom wants you to clean out the garage and clean the living room before we get home today. Love, Ma. PS. She also said don't eat all the cereal because she just bought that box yesterday. And don't spend your day in front of the TV. PPS. I want some of that Cinnamon Toast Crunch when I get home so there better be some left! PPPS. Rematch on Call Of_ Duty _ when I get home!"_

I couldn't help but laugh and be creeped out a bit at how well they knew me.

But I guess that's their job as mothers.

I ended up leaving half the box of cereal for Ma and I vacuumed and dusted the living room.

The garage, however was going to take a bit more work.

_ Wait._

They want me to have fun but give me these chores that will take hours to get done!

_Seriously?! _

I better get this done unless I want to sit through another hour long speech about how important it is to be clean and things of that nature.

Trust me, it's not something I would wish on my worst enemy.

My parents can drone on and on about the most smallest things.

It took me around three hours to clean the garage out but it wasn't too bad.

I found a box labeled _Henry's Old Things _and I figured what better way to spend the rest of my afternoon than reminiscing about my childhood.

I brought the box inside and sat on the couch as I went through it.

The first thing I pulled out was a photo album full of my baby pictures.

They sure did take a lot of them...

Then there were pictures of just mom and I, before Ma came along.

But that's a story for a later day.

The next thing was a baby blanket with my name embroidered on it.

_Henry._

Named after my grandfather, mom always made sure I was proud to bear the name Henry.

At the bottom of the box were a cluster of toys that were covered in layers of dust.

But one thing in particular stood out, the one thing that I held close to my heart.

My stuffed teddy bear, Mr. Snuggles.

Don't judge me...

I used to suffer from terrible nightmares and mom promised that as long as I had Mr. Snuggles, I would be okay.

I still feel you judging me...

I took him out of the box and just looked at him, a bright smile on my lips.

I didn't hear the front door open and shut, nor did I hear heels clicking along the floor followed by the squeaking sound of boots.

"I know sweetheart but still, I don't think a cheeseburger would be wise for dinner tonight. I'm trying to watch my figure." I heard mom say.

Ma laughed, "I'm watching your figure too and it's perfect so why don't you stop being such a perfectionist and indulge in little piece of heaven."

"Mmm. I will, but that's later on tonight."

I dropped my head into the couch, gosh they were so corny.

I usually excused myself from the room when they began flirting.

"Can you guys not!?" I mumbled through the pillow.

They both just shared a chuckle before they each kissed my head.

"Did you clean out the garage?" Mom asked and I nodded.

"That's where I found this box with some of my old things in it."

Ma flopped on the couch next to me, grabbing the photo album and flipping through the pages.

"Babe, why was this album put up? It should be out here so we can show off how cute Henry was."

"_Was?_ Psh, I'm still cute. I'm a hearth throb as a matter of fact."

Mom made her way into the kitchen, she usually liked to have a glass of wine every Monday when she got home.

Mondays were hard on them both but Ma enjoyed eating a burger and fries rather than drinking wine.

"Oh, I figured it would make you feel a bit uncomfortable since you aren't in any of the pictures. But we can leave it out if you want."

Mom sat down on the other side of me, sipping her wine as she grabbed the photo album to look through it as well.

"It's fine with me. The past is the past, all that matters is that we're a family now. Speaking of family, you know my parents are coming this weekend, right?"

Mom sighed and my smile got even bigger.

Grandma Mary-Margaret and Grandpa David coming meant I would get presents.

"How could I forget?" Mom smirked and gulped down the rest of her wine. "I'm going to need more wine..."

"I'm going to have to go out and buy some beer for dad. And vodka for me. I'm just glad your mom isn't coming as well. We don't need a repeat of what happened the last time."

Let's just say my grandparents butt heads a lot.

It's a story for another time...

"Right. Well, I'll go get dinner started. Henry, be sure to put this box away when you're done."

Mom stood up after taking her heels off and headed back into the kitchen.

"I hope you're cooking burgers!"

"In your dreams!"

"You're always in my dreams!"

"We're eating salad!"

"You enjoy killing my joy, don't you?"

"It's the highlight of my day!"

They always play around with each other like this.

Eh, I guess it's sweet in a way.

Ma ruffled my hair, "You didn't eat all the cereal right?"

I laughed, "There's half a box left. You're gonna need sugar to help you win this rematch."

"_Pft._ Keep dreaming kid. I'm going to kick your butt in this rematch."

Mom poked her head out the kitchen, "No butt-kicking!"

"Yes, yes we know Madame Mayor." Ma mocked, winking as she nudged me.

"Don't make me come in there with this wooden spoon!"

Yeah, I forgot to mention we aren't really normal.

But I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world.

Dinner was pretty quiet, Ma wasn't too happy with eating just salad.

She kept asking mom if this was a joke and where the meat was.

And of course mom just narrowed her eyes and ignored the questions.

I cleared the table while Ma went to change out of her uniform and into her pajamas.

Mom changed too and she was in her office talking on the phone.

I was still in my pajamas so I was good.

"Ready kid?" Ma asked as we both sat back down on the couch and grabbed the PS3 controllers.

"Question is, are _you_ ready? I was born ready."

She smirked, "Big talk from such a small kid. Get ready to learn how it's done grasshopper."

We played for at least an hour and I won again.

Mom even decided to come watch us and she cheered me on.

Ma sulked, "That's so mean, you cheer the kid on but I'm your wife."

Mom lightly laughed, "He won the game but you get the prize."

"ALRIGHT! That's my queue to go to bed. Night guys!" I kissed them both on the cheek as they laughed at me.

"Good night sweetheart."

"Night kid."

I sat Mr. Snuggles on the shelf in my room and climbed into bed.

Today was pretty chilled, but who knows what the future has in store for us.


	2. Family Fun

I never know what to expect from my parents.

Everyday is a new adventure with them and sometimes it can be exciting and sometimes it can scare the crap out of me.

But my grandparents could always manage to make sure I had fun whenever they were around.

They had Ma when they were pretty young, and I'm talking like 15-16 years old, but there was so much love between them that they were able to stay together and raise her in a loving enviromemt.

Grandma Cora on the other hand, well she can be interesting at times but she is _really_ strict.

Her and Grandpa Henry raised my mom and Aunt Zelena in a relatively normal setting.

She believes too much tv and computer will rot the brain.

Therefore anytime I go to her house, she makes me turn my phone and handheld game off and give it to her, then we sit for about 4 hours and read books about different things.

I guess she means well and I do learn new things, so I don't completely hate going to her house but I don't love it either.

Grandma Mary Margaret and Grandpa David were coming today and I felt like a kid at christmas.

I couldn't even sleep, that's how excited I was.

I was thinking about all the different things we would do, the games we would play and just all the laughter we would share.

I think my brain eventually tired itself because I ended up falling asleep around 2 am.

The sweet aroma of chocolate chip cookies woke me up and I saw a plate of them sitting on my nightstand but no one was in my room.

_They're here!_

I ate a cookie before jumping out of bed, I could hear laughter downstairs, they must be in the living room.

I dashed toward the sound and when I saw them, I had the biggest smile on my face.

"Gramps! Grandma!"

They stood up and Grandma Mary Margaret held her arms out, "Look at my handsome young grandson!"

I embraced them both, "You're getting bigger every time I see you. That's my boy!"

I could hear my grandfather say as they both let go of me.

I could see a glimpse of mom in the kitchen and mama was sitting on the couch opposite of where my grandparents were.

"Morning kid. Sleep well?" she asked as I flopped down next to her.

"Yeah. It wasn't as great as waking up to cookies on my nightstand though."

I winked at Grandma MM and she smirked.

Mama shook her head, "You better not let your mom find out. You know how she feels about you and chocolate."

Mom refused to allow me to eat candy most of my childhood, especially chocolate.

Grandma Cora had done the same thing to her when she was growing up, she would say chocolate would turn little kids into balloons.

Now of course my mom never told me a crazy lie like that but she would say it rots teeth and that I should have a healthier snack instead.

But when I turned 14, I got my first taste of chocolate and I can never give it up, it's just too good!

Well, sort of.

I've been experimenting with different kinds of candy and soon I'll be able to know what my favorite is.

"Oh please, a little chocolate never hurt a child. We fed you chocolate all the time and look at you." Grandma MM protested and Ma just laughed.

"I had to join a gym when I was 13! And it's even sadder when I think about the fact that the biggest I've ever been, wasn't while I was pregnant with Henry."

Oh right, I forgot to mention, mama is my biological mom.

She had given me up for adoption and mom adopted me.

Then nine years later they bumped into each other and-

Wait.

This is a pretty long story so I'll just tell it to you later.

I _promise_.

Grandpa scoffed, "I tried to get you to play more sports but your mother insisted I not be too hard on you. She claimed playing on the basketball and volleyball team was enough and that you couldn't handle football too."

Yeah, we're a family of athletes.

Grandpa played college football but then decided to become a vet and grandma is an amazing competitive archer and teaches at an elementary school.

Ma was going to play college volleyball but then she got pregnant with me and then things got a tad bit difficult.

"It's okay, I put them in my secret hiding place." I assured Grandma MM and Ma placed her hand on my head.

"I really hope you put them in a Ziploc bag before putting them in your top drawer in that little box."

My mouth dropped and all of them started laughing.

I can't believe she knew where my spot was!

I have _got_ to have more privacy in this house.

"What's so funny in here?" Mom asked as she brought a tray of drinks in with her.

"We were just laughing at Henry's expense." Grandma MM mentioned before grabbing a cup of coffee.

She smiled after the first sip and thanked mom for the delicious drink.

Grandpa David doesn't like coffeee so mom brought him some apple juice, one of his favorites.

"You are the sweetest daughter-in-law I have ever had." he smiled.

Ma facepalmed at how unfunny grandpa was while mom just grinned with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm your only daughter-in-law. But thank you, dad. That means a lot."

"I need a drink…" Ma murmured as she stood up and headed into the office her and mom shared.

They kept the alcohol in there, I guess to keep me from trying to bother it.

Not really sure.

"Henry, would you do me a favor and go into my bedroom and grab the envelope that's sitting on my nightstand?"

I nodded, "Yes ma'am."

I was usually never allowed in my parent's bedroom and it didn't bother me one bit.

Truth be told, I was a bit afraid to go in there sometimes for fear I might find something I didn't want to see.

But disobeying either of my moms would result in WW5 so I just do as I'm told.

When I opened the door to their room, the first thing that caught my eye was the burger-shaped alarm clock sitting on the nightstand.

I'm pretty sure that's the side Ma sleeps on.

Since this was the first and probably last time I'd be in here, I took a moment to really look around.

It was neat, no clothes on the floor, but there were a few papers scattered around on the bed.

I guess mom's been handling some work.

I looked for the envelope but it wasn't on the nightstand, I figured it may be in the drawer.

God, why did I have to think that?

I am scarred for life by what I saw, or felt rather, that was in that drawer.

I won't go into explicit detail about what it was just in case the person reading this is too young to understand but I will say something started making a humming noise….

Yeah…

It caused me to slowly back out of the room, quietly closing the door and I walked back downstairs with widened eyes.

My moms were sitting side by side, Ma was drinking a glass of vodka I presumed and my grandparents were talking but all I heard was a muffled sound.

My brain had zoned out, all I could think about was what just happened.

Grandma MM was the first to notice me as I went to sit back down.

"Henry, what's wrong?" She asked with a furrowed brow and all I could do was look at her.

My brain wouldn't let me move my lips to speak.

"Son, did you find the envelope?" Mom asked, confusion in her tone.

I just stared at her and Ma, tilting my head a little.

Why'd they have to ruin my precious, innocent mind?

My mouth opened as I tried to form words.

I wanted to say, "No, I couldn't find it." just so I could forget that ever happened but my brain just laughed at me and said nope.

The word that managed to fly out of my mouth as my face began to look disturbed was, "WHY?!"

I cried out and I'm almost certain Ma knew exactly what happened.

"Kid…you opened the drawer, didn't you?"

I never took my eyes off the both of them as I nodded.

Grandma MM came and sat next to me and began rubbing my back, trying to soothe me.

"What the hell is in that drawer that would traumatize him like this?!"

Both my moms looked at each other and then back at me, "It's nothing….It was a clown picture in the drawer and Henry's afraid of clowns. That's all." Mom answered.

Gramps was suspicious, "If he's afraid of clowns then why didn't he run away from them when we took him to the circus last month?"

I swear all I wanted was for this conversation to be over!

Kids my age don't want to talk about, let alone _think_ about their parents having sex.

It's just gross.

I sat there like a zombie while my moms tried to defend themselves against my grandparents.

"Emma, what's in the drawer. Tell me now or I'll go up there and see for myself."

Grandma MM demanded, and she was dead serious too.

Don't ask why someone would do that to their grown daughter but my grandparents have always been over-protective.

They've since calmed down some since she started dating mom and they found out I was their grandson.

"Shit…" Ma sighed, "I'm going to need that whole bottle of vodka now. It's a toy. Happy now?"

She got up and went back into the office, coming back with the whole bottle.

"A toy?" Gramps asked.

When he finally realized what she meant, the horrified look on his face was priceless.

Had I not been traumatized, I would've been rolling on the floor laughing.

Grandma MM on the other hand took it better than I imagined, she stopped rubbing my back and just hugged me.

"You poor child! No wonder he hasn't spoken! You two should hide your stuff better!"

Mom snatched the bottle from Ma and took a long gulp.

"Hey! I was using that!"

"Yeah well, I needed it more."

Gramps took a moment to regain him composure, "What your mother is trying to say is, things should be hidden far, **FAR**, out of reach for anyone except you two. Especially if you plan to have more kids."

Kids?

What kids?

Pft, I'm the only kid in this house.

Just as mom was about to answer him, my brain finally allowed me to speak.

I jumped up, "No kids! What kids?!"

I almost wished I was still in that zombie state because everyone stared at me like I had lost my mind.

Mom furrowed her brow, a frown almost forming on her lips.

I reseated myself before someone else did and after what felt like an eternity of silence, Ma stood up.

"Son, follow me."

I didn't even think to resist, I just did as I was asked.

She led me into the kitchen, I think partially because she wanted to grab one of the cookies grandma made.

"Kid, we are _so_ sorry you had to witness that. From now on you won't have to go in our room and just in case you do, we'll have stuff like that hidden a lot better. But I guess you do need to know what it was that you saw….Right?"

I just shook my head, "I already know what it was."

"_You do?_ Oh thank God!" She grabbed her chest, letting out a sigh of relief.

"I can't tell you how happy I am that we don't have to have this talk. Oh man. In that case, here, have a cookie."

Just as I was about to say something she shoved a cookie in my mouth.

We couldn't do anything but laugh.

I bit down on the sweet treat, "Well, I'm a smart, curious kid."

"Like mother like son." Mom said as she walked in behind us.

"What are you trying to say?" Ma asked with a smirk.

Mom walked up to Ma, oh gosh typing like this can get quite confusing, "Exactly what I said. Our son takes after you and that can be quite unfortunate at times." She replied, matching the smirk.

Ma sipped from her cup, "Well everything he learned, he learned from you."

I stood in silence, chomping on my cookie.

"Mhm….that's why he's so smart."

She grabbed the glass and sat it down on the counter before their lips met each other.

"Uh HEY! Kid still in the room!" I pleaded, covering my eyes.

"Uh, go, go back in there with your grandparents. Tell them they can take you to the arcade now."

Mom waved her hand, never taking her eyes off Ma.

"Yes!" I cheered as I ran back in the living room.

I may be young but I knew why my parents wanted to be alone but I didn't care.

An afternoon at the arcade with my grandparents meant an endless amount of games.

You get no complaints from me.

I told you before, anytime my grandparents come over, it's always fun for me.

I spent my afternoon playing different games and watching my grandmother freak out when she played a zombie game for the first time.

I'm pretty sure my moms had fun too.

Thank God I wasn't home to hear anything.

Oh!

And in case you were wondering, the envelope was actually under the bed.

When I asked how it got there, my mothers' faces just turned red.

You can kind of put the pieces together...


	3. Vlogging Gone Wrong

Technology is one of my best friends. I can't ever leave my house without my phone or else I feel a sense of being naked.

Hey, don't make that face. You know exactly what I'm talking about.

I bet $5 that you've done the Pat Down Dance at least once when you try to remember if you put your phone in your pocket.

But it's not just my phone that I love, I love my video games, my laptop and most of all, my new camera that Grandma Mary Margaret and Grandpa David bought for me before they went home.

It's been sitting on my desk, still in the box because I don't know what I want to do with it just yet.

Some of my friends suggested vlogging and it wasn't such a bad idea.

I thought my family was pretty entertaining, maybe other people will too.

So the first thing I did this morning was hop on youtube and create a page.

_The Swan-Mills Family. _

And I even found a really cool logo that used a swan, so of course I had to utilize what was obviously meant for me.

I unwrapped my camera after scimming over the instruction manual, because let's be honest, most new technology we get, we just learn how to use it through trial and error.

There'e no such thing as using the instruction manual unless you're having troubleshootig problems.

I turned it on, flipping out the screen so I could see what the camera saw, and turned it so that the camera faced me.

"Hello world, my name is Henry Swan-Mills and yes you always say both names or my moms get pissed. This is my first time vlogging, I'm not too sure what I should say or do."

I smiled and shrugged, keeping my eyes on the camera.

"Oh! I know. Let's go introduce you to my moms. I think they're up."

I tip toed down the hall, shushing the camera that was facing the floor as I listened for any indication that my mothers were up.

I couldn't hear anything upstairs so they were probably downstairs in the kitchen.

The smell of coffee confirmed my suspicion as I reached the bottom of the stairs.

"Emma Swan-Mills, you and I both know that you don't need a new car. The one you have works just fine!" My mom softly snapped as she drank her coffee, I quickly tilted the camera up to capture the both of them at the bar in the kitchen.

"But Ginaaa...this new car has internet in it! Pleeeaaasseee!" Momma pouted, giving mom her best version of puppy dog eyes.

Oh my gosh this was golden stuff, priceless footage that I was _not_ going to miss. I stayed hidden as I continued filming, careful to stifle any laughs I felt coming as I listened and watched my parents.

"Seriously? That's why you want the car? Wireless internet. You need to rethink your priorities dear." Mom replied, giving no recognition to momma's puppy dog eyes.

"You're just being an old person. We have to keep up with the times. Killian has one!"

Killian was one of her closest friends, they normally went out to drink once a week to just hang out. Plus he worked with her at the Police Station.

"That's your counter argument? I swear sometimes it's like I have two children instead of one!"

"Grouchypants!"

Mom raised her brow, slowly letting her lips curl into a smirk, "Grouchypants huh?"

She began to round the bar, walking closer to Momma.

"Regina...what are you doing?" her eyes widened and so did mine. "I didn't mean it...I swear." She pleaded and I quietly pleaded for her too.

This was going to get so many views, people are going to know who the Swan-Mills family is.

Mom whispered something but I was just too far to catch it. Whatever it was though, it had to be bad because Momma dropped her head onto the counter and groaned loudly in agitation while Mom just chuckled, evily I might add.

"That's some really cruel punishment Regina."

"I know. That's why I picked it." Mom turned to walk out the kitchen and I quickly pulled the camera into me, hoping she wouldn't notice.

"Henry!? Were you spying on us?!"

Welp, she noticed. Thank goodness for fast reflexes, I was able to close the camera, turning the light off.

"Nah mom. I just got down here, I was going to grab a bowl of cereal."

I offered a sweet smile and she kissed my cheek. "Mhm. You and your mother are two of a kind. I don't know what I'm going to do with th two of you. Probably go bat shit crazy." she kept talking as she walked upstairs, eventually closing her bedroom door behind her.

I headed into the kitchen and patted momma on the back, "Morning Momma. Rough day already?"

She lifted her head and gave a grin, "Kid, you have no idea. Your mom won't let me eat fatty foods or drink with Killian or by myself for a month."

Holy crap, she's not going to make it that long. I know my momma better than she knows herself and she if she can't get a burger or alcohol for a month, this house is going to turn upside down.

"Oh man, that sucks. What did you do?" I asked as I picked out the type of cereal I wanted.

She gasped, "What makes you think I did something to deserve that?"

I gave her a '_really mom_' look and she sighed, "Okay fine. I called her old and a grouchy pants."

I shook my head as I covered my mouth to laugh, "You were asking for it. You're lucky she didn't do worse."

Momma rested her head back on the bar, groaning loudly, "Ugh! I'm a grown woman! I do what I want!"

A laugh came from upstairs, "Says the woman who has a hamburger for an alarm clock!"

"At least I'm trying to be responsible!"

_Crap_, this was another golden opportunity but I couldn't film, not yet at least.

"Well Miss Responsible, don't forget to go grocery shopping! And take our son with you so he can learn what responsibility _really_ looks like."

Why was I being dragged into this?

"But I was gonna play video games today, mom!"

"You're going to the store! End of discussion!"

Momma sucked her teeth, "Damn woman. She better be glad I love her…." she muttered under her breath.

For some reason, mom was always able to hear us, like she had some secret hearing power.

I huffed, she knew exactly how to ruin the lazy day I had planned for myself but I didn't dare argue.

I'm bold. Just not that bold.

"Forget your cereal, kid. We'll go to the store then grab some food before we come back."

I smirked, I knew exactly what she meant.

I dropped the box and ran to put my shoes on, keeping the camera with me.

While we walked to the store, I turned the camera on and pointed the lens on myself, "So my mom sent me and my momma to the store. She's grouchy sometimes…"

I whispered to the camera, "But that's just between you and I."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw momma look at me like I was crazy.

"Kid, what the hell are you doing?"

I pointed the camera to her, "Vlogging. It's fun."

She held her hand up to the lens, covering it, "What is vlogging and why are you doing it?"

I turn the camera back to me but I kept eye contact with her, "It's just using the camera to record what your day is like then putting it on Youtube for the world to see."

"Your mom isn't going to like that…"

I shrugged, "Which is why she won't know. At least not for awhile."

Momma stopped in her tracks, "Wait, you've been recording all day?"

I reluctantly nodded, "Yeah, why?"

She didn't say anything, instead she quickly grabbed the camera from me.

"Hey! Ma, come on, what are you doing?"

"Reviewing."

She pressed a few buttons but I couldn't see what she was doing.

Then I heard what I recorded earlier, when her and mom were talking.

She watched closely then her gaze met me and she narrowed her eyes, "You recorded us and we didn't know?"

I didn't answer and she just looked at me.

You know that look your parents give you when they cross their arms and shift their weight to one side as they stare at you, waiting.

Yeah, I call that the Look Of Death.

And it gets worse when they start tapping their foot.

Oh jeez, you might as well sign your own death certificate at that point because you know you're in trouble.

"Answer me, son."

I looked down at the pavememt, "Why?! You do understand that this is a violation of privacy right?! Son this is illegal. You cannot film someone without their consent. And I bet you were going to put this on the internet, weren't you?"

There's nothing worse than getting in trouble in public.

"Hellooo...Earth to Henry. I'm talking to you."

She snapped her fingers, signaling for me to look at her, "I don't know."

"That's not an answer. But that's alright, I know a better one. This will stay in my possession until I can trust you won't go around filming people without their consent."

I frowned, "Seriously?! That's mine!"

Remember the Look Of Death? Yeah, the look I got after that was much, much worse.

"Excuse me? What was that?"

"Nothing…"

It was better to let it go than to be embarrassed in public.

"Thought so. Let's go."

She put my camera in her pocket and started walking, I was dragging behind.

It was a quiet grocery trip and on the way back home, we stopped to grab a burger, splitting it in half.

"Thanks." I said quietly.

She sighed, "I'm sorry for going off on you like that. But what you did, that cannot ever happen again. Okay?"

I nodded, "I understand."

She handed me the camera, "If I find out you do that again, I'm taking the camera and giving it to your mom."

That…would be so, oh gosh you guys can imagine the trouble I'd be in.

"It won't happen again. Promise."

She smiled, "Good. Now finish eating before we get home."

In order to ensure we finished our burgers before we get home, we took the long way, taking a stroll through the park.

We only had one bag of groceries, just some meat and vegetables for tonight's dinner so my hands were free.

I took out the camera, "So my momma and I stopped to grab a burger, you guys should try Granny's Burgers if you're ever in New York City. Right Ma?"

I kept it on me and she laughed, "Right kid. They are by far the best ever."

"Yep! So we're on our way home. My mom's probably taking a nap so it's probably wise to keep quiet. I'll be playing my game and probably pick back up with vlogging later on today."

I smiled at the camera and winked before turning it off and putting it in my pocket.

"You really like the vlogging thing, huh?"

I slightly shrugged, "It's okay."

She wrapped her arm around me, finishing her burger, "Well if you decide you really like it, maybe we can get some equipment to enhance your vlogging."

"Really?" I smiled brightly.

"Yep!" She kissed my cheek and I scrunched up my nose as I groaned, "Aw Ma, come on. You smell like onions!"

We both just laughed, "You'll be alright."

We got home, mom was doing laundry and she had momma start cutting up the vegetables for dinner.

I took my jacket off and sat it on the couch while I played my video game, forgetting the camera was in my jacket pocket.

So here's what must've happened, when mom grabbed my jacket to wash it, she must not have felt the weight difference until she got into the laundry room and that's when she discovered the camera.

Because she came back in the living room, holding it in her hand with a frown on her face that would scare the most evil person.

I already knew by the look on her face and the way she was holding the camera that she had watched what I filmed.

I quickly paused my game and looked at Ma in the kitchen, "So, I hope you two are ready for what's about to happen."

She looked at the both of us before walking out of the room.

My eyes widened, when she usually looked like that and spoke so calmly, it meant hell on earth for whoever pissed her off.

"Shit…" Ma said as she ran behind mom but it was too late, mom slammed their bedroom door and locked it.

"Regina! Babe, come on! Open the door!"

When Ma walked back in the room, I knew her pleading didn't work.

There was no telling as to what mom was planning and that's the scary part.

About an hour went by and she came back downstairs smiling, acting as if nothing was wrong.

"Uh mom, where's my camera?"

She looked at me, "In your room sweetheart."

"In one piece, right?"

She chuckled, "Of course, dear. Why wouldn't it be?"

I shook my head, "No reason."

I went back to playing my game and momma sighed, "Regina I'm sorry."

She kissed Ma, "I know. But it's okay. Your punishment comes later."

"Uh oh…"

"Mhmm…"

I was just about to say something when my phone started buzzing like crazy, I was getting text messages from all my friends.

They were all saying the same thing, "Dude, you're on youtube!"

I couldn't understand what they were talking about so I had one of them send me the link to the video they were all talking about and my phone hit the floor when I saw the video.

"MOOOM!"


	4. Tis Nothing Sweeter Than Revenge

"Yes Henry?" She turned to look at me, the most vindictive smile on her face.

"YOU PUT THAT ON YOUTUBE?! WHY?!"

"I thought it'd be interesting for your channel, dear."

Her tone...ugh, she knew exactly why she did it and that wasn't it.

I was being punished for something my other mother had done.

"No...NO!-"

A hand came up, pausing me from continuing, "Watch your tone before you say something you're going to regret." she warned sternly but my mind was clouded with thoughts of how embarrassing this was.

How was I going to ever live down the fact that there is now a video of me up on the internet of me as a little kid, dancing around my house to Beyonce with a wig on?

My reputation is now ruined, all thanks to my mother.

I let out an exasperated sigh, slumping into the couch as I crossed my arms with a huff and grumbled.

"And as for _you_, Miss Swan..."

The sound of heels clicking along the tile floor faded as she walked closer to Momma.

"Regina, I love you so much, you are the apple of my eye."

A cackle slipped past her lips, "I know you do, dear. And you'll have the chance to prove it because you will not be eating any_ fruit_ for two months."

I blinked, furrowing my brow, what did fruit have to do with anything?

Momma grumbled too, "That's torture Regina, and you know it."

"Oh no, torture looks more like what I'll be doing to you tonight."

I slowly turned my head to the left, my nose turned up at their grossness.

But before I could mention that their child was still in the room, Mom leaned in and kissed Momma.

My eyes shut within a second, "Child in the room!" I shouted, throwing my arms up in the air.

They pulled back from kissing and I just rolled my eyes, "Henry, why don't you go outside and play?" Mom asked softly and I scoffed, "Play? What am I? _Ten_?"

Picking my controller back up, I un-paused my game and resumed playing.

Momma cleared her throat, "Uh, kid..._go play._"

Her tone on the other hand was serious and then, just then, it clicked.

"_Oooh!_ You guys want me to go play? Got it. I'm just...I'll be at the park."

Jumping off the couch, I wasted no time grabbing my phone and jacket, swiftly making my way out the door and down the street.

I cringed at the thought of my parents doing..._it_...

I would believe most people don't particularly enjoy the mental image of their parents making love.

Oh God.

_Ew._

Brain, can you not?

The park was nearby and my favorite part of it was empty; the swings.

I sat down and let my gaze linger along the ground under my feet before I heard a soft voice, "If it isn't Henry Mills sitting alone at the park."

As I looked up, I couldn't help but smile brightly.

"Grace..."

Grace Hatter, we've been friends since we were in Kindergarten.

She moved to sit in the swing next to me.

"Hey Hen-Hen. How you holding up after, y'know, the whole video thing?"

I shook my head, "The guys are going to joke about this for as long as I live."

She let out the cutest giggle, "I thought it was adorable."

"Is that so? Well maybe I'll have to re-enact it for you someday."

She grabbed the chains of my swing, pulling me closer to her and pressing her lips against mine.

Oh yeah, did I forget to mention she was my girlfriend?

And that my moms _don't_ know?

_Oh..._


	5. Smooch of Death

Grace and I hung out for about three hours at the park, talking, watching the sun set, and you know, uhm, other things teens like to do. But don't get the wrong picture! We just stuck to making out. Is it weird to say she takes my breath away? Probably...But she does. And my heart skips like three beats when I'm with her. It's so weird. But now I'm walking home because I may have accidentally forgotten that curfew is at 9 p.m. and it's thirty minutes after. I made sure to walk Grace home first though, I didn't want her walking home in the dark by herself. Nah, couldn't let that happen.

When I got to our apartment door though, I could see that the lights were off by looking at the bottom of the door and it just so happens I forgot my keys in my room. So I have two options: knock on the door until my moms come and answer, hopefully fully dressed, and get grounded for coming in late. Oooor. Sneak inside by picking the lock and hope for the best. As you can probably guess, I'm going with option two here. I really, really don't want to stop my moms midway through their...love making? God it makes me not want eyeballs just thinking about it. I get it, I get it, true love and stuff, yeah yeah. But look, until you have to walk in accidentally on your parents doing the do, you can't judge me. It's bad enough I have to endure their lovey dovey overprotective mother-ness.

I'd like to keep my mind as innocent as possible, thank you very much. Okay, back to getting inside. I looked around to make sure I was alone before pulling out the few tools I needed. These I remember but my keys I forget. Sometimes I wish I could shake myself. Although if I succeed, this calls for a celebratory round of Halo with some pizza and soda. Bending down and beginning to pick the lock, I tried to stay as quiet as possible, remembering what Ma taught me about listening for the clicks. After ten minutes and three tries, I finally got it right and the lock turned, the door opening for me. My victory lasted all of five seconds because when I looked up, I saw Ma aiming her gun with Mom standing behind her with my metal baseball bat. I'm guessing they thought I was a burglar.

"Uh...hey?" I spoke, slowly rising to my feet. Both of them were definitely not pleased and by the looks of them wearing their robes, I must've caught them in a compromising position. "Inside. NOW." Ma lowered her gun, turning the safety back on as she checked to make sure no one was with me before slamming the door closed and locking it. "I didn't mean to uh, wake you guys. I forgot my keys in my room." I stood in the middle of the living room, avoiding eye contact at all costs. Like, I pretended if I looked at them my eyes would melt out of my head; that was my ONLY mission.

"It seems you forgot your brain too. Why not just knock on the damn door, kid? I just so happened to be coming to grab a beer from the kitchen when I heard the clicking of the lock. So imagine mine and your mom's face when we're thinking someone's trying to break in. The only thing on our minds is protecting you, only to find out you're on the opposite side of the door. Care to tell us why you're out past curfew anyway?" Ma was grilling me like Mom usually does. Instead, she was holding the bat and staring at me like I was a foreign object.

"Yes Henry, tell us...what were you doing during all those hours?" Mom finally spoke up, her voice one step away step away from utter disgust. Now, I know most people exaggerate when they say mothers know everything but I really believe mom knew what I had been doing even before she asked and I answered. Shifting my weight on my feet, I still faithfully kept my gaze away from their faces, "I was just with a friend. I'm sorry, we just lost track of time. I'm not that late..." Why, Henry? Why would you say that? Instant regret. "We?" "Not that late?" Each one spoke their question simultaneously and I swear it felt like someone had just punched me in the gut. "Wait..." Mom walked toward me, I could see her feet coming my direction, stopping just a few feet away.

"Is that...lip gloss on your lips?" She questioned and I would've fainted right then and there if I wasn't afraid they'd just shake me until I woke up. "What?" I knit my brows together, my hand coming up to wipe my lips as I looked up but she grabbed my arm midway, holding it tight. "It is," Ma added, coming over to us. Oh God Henry, you lived a good life. At least the funeral will be nice. "You were kissing some girl?!" Some girl?! "She is not some girl!" I shouted without thinking and it wasn't clear to me that I had said anything until I saw both of them look at each other then back at me but by then, all the base in my voice faded and my eyes were wide. I won't say it was fear but, it was a word that rhymes with rear. "Then who is she?" I had their undivided attention whether I wanted it or not.

"A friend?" Mom tsk'ed, "A friend that you suck lips with it?" I groaned at that, I really didn't feel like talking about this with them, especially right now. "No...I mean...why don't we all just go to bed? It's pretty late." Ma grabbed my shirt just as I was about to start walking toward my room, "Not so fast kid. Nice try but you aren't going anywhere until we have all the information we want and need." I internally kicked myself. "Exactly. So is this little...," You should've seen mom's face. Had I not been in trouble, I swear I would've laughed. "...chick your girlfriend?" Sighing, I knew the sooner I said it, the sooner I just went on and told them what they wanted, this would be over.

"Yes. Grace is my girlfriend." Both of them just stared blankly at me. And I mean, like they were lost in space-type staring. It happened so long that I almost thought I needed to call the paramedics or something. At least until mom spoke up first, "I'm calling your grandmother." That was never a good thing. Especially since she hated talking to my grandmother. "Wait! No!" She raised a daring brow and I immediately shut up. "Go to bed, kid. We'll finish this conversation tomorrow." Ma instructed as she followed behind mom to their bedroom, leaving me in the dimly lit living room with only one thought; I am going to die tomorrow.


	6. Welcome To Hell

I couldn't sleep at all last night. You know that feeling when your impending doom is coming, and I mean coming fast, yeah, that's what's haunted me the entire night. That and the fact that I could hear bits and pieces of my moms' conversation with my grandmother.

So all I could do was lay there in my bed and stare at the ceiling as I started planning out my eulogy. I wanted Grace to have my games, books and that one sweater she always steals from me any time I wear it to school when it's cool outside.

My family could sift and pick from whatever was left. The hours rolled by and shockingly once my clock read 6:00 a.m. my brain finally decided to let me sleep. Didn't last but an hour before my bedroom door burst open, jolting me from the bed and causing me to land on the floor, groggy and grouchy. "Rise and shine, Romeo!" Ma shouted in a much too pleasant and teasing tone.

"Come on downstairs, everyone's waiting for you." Everyone? Who the hell was everyone? Scrambling to my feet once she walked back downstairs, I had a quick fist fight with the air and whined at the loss of sleep before managing to straighten my face and make my way to where 'everyone' was.

If I act in the next minute, maybe I can pack a quick bag and make a run for it. No? Yeah, I didn't think so either. My legs are quick but Ma's are quicker and surprisingly, Mom can run fast in heels should the situation call for it. So that plan was a no-go.

Each step I took felt like one more step closer to death, at least until I saw who was downstairs. "Grace?" My jaw dropped to the floor and my heart stopped. Completely. No you don't understand, like I was dead for a good five minutes. Grace, her dad, my moms and grandmother were all sitting in the living room and here I stood in my pajamas, staring like I had just seen a ghost.

"It's so nice of you to join us, Henry." Mom spoke first just before sipping her coffee. Though my eyes were fixated on my girlfriend, the fact that everyone aside from her was wearing these calm expressions was what worried me the most. Grace stared back at me with just as much confusion. Clearly she hadn't been briefed on what's transpired over the course of the past 12 hours.

"What's the matter, son? Cat got your tongue?" Grandma Cora asked, walking over to me and wrapping her arm around my shoulders, her nails digging a bit into my shirt and making me wince slightly. "Uh no grandma. I'm just...shocked. And a bit embarrassed that I'm not dressed for the occasion." She walked me over to the couch where everyone was seated neatly, I was too afraid to look up at her or my mothers so I continued to focus on Grace, wishing I could wipe the fear from her eyes. Much to my displeasure, I was seated between my grandma and mom, releasing a breath I hadn't noticed I was holding in when her arm unraveled from around my shoulder.

"Not to worry dear, this won't take too long." Mom said as she noticed how my gaze stayed on the floor while I played with my fingers. Finally, against my better judgement, I looked up and all eyes were on me. Gathering the gall to speak, I cleared my throat first, "Why are Grace and her dad here?"

Shockingly a much deeper voice answered me, "That's a good question. We're here because it's obvious you and my daughter have this special relationship, correct?" Swallowing thickly, I nodded and bravely made eye contact with him.

"Yes sir." Out of the corner of my eye I noticed how amused my family was. "Well then I think it's time to make arrangements. Don't you?" By now my throat was beating in my throat, "Ara-arrangements?"

"Yes. I want to make sure my little Grace here is made an honest woman so I was thinking a Spring wedding once the flowers have bloomed."

Just then the room was slightly spinning, the veins in my head thumping at the same time as my heart; rapidly. "Papa! I'm not ready to get married!" Grace pleaded and if it weren't for her angelic voice I definitely would've fainted.

"You two are already romantically involved. Might as well tie the knot." Ma decided to chime in and I had had enough of this madness. Standing up, I stood in front of them all. "We are too young to get married, you guys are crazy!" Before another word was spoken laughter erupted from everyone except Grace and I, who both stared at each other in confusion.

"Exactly. So why would you think it was okay to date without telling us first?" Mom had that scary look on her face now and had me at a loss for words. "Henry," Mr. Hatter started, "you're a good kid and I don't have a problem with you and Grace seeing each other. I trust that you'll treat her with the utmost respect. Your mothers and I were just disappointed that you two tried to keep it a secret."

While Grace's hand rested over her chest, obviously relieved, I tried my best to calm myself, "I'm sorry that we didn't say anything. We just wanted to be sure that this was something we wanted before we told you guys." I did my best with pleading my side of the story and like the saving grace that she is, Grace stood up and walked by my side, "He's right. We've only been together about two weeks. But I'm certain that this is what I want. Henry?" And just when the attention had been pulled away from me long enough to even my breathing out, all eyes were on me once more.

"Y-yes. This is what I want." To put emphasis on my choice, I took her hand in mine, letting my thumb stroke lightly over the back of her hand. "How annoyingly sweet." Grandma Cora commented with a scoff. Yeah, she was probably never going to like any girl I dated. Her and mom were two of a kind. "Your mother and I don't have a problem with you two dating either."

My eyes widened at that, "Wait, really?" Both of them nodded. "And you can go on your first official date…right after you serve your three-month sentence of being grounded." Ma walked over and loving, ironic really, ruffled my hair. It was too good to be true.

"Three months sounds like a good number. Grace, consider yourself grounded as well. Starting today. Come along." Mr. Hatter thanked my moms and grandma for inviting him over and my girlfriend and I hugged before she followed him out of the door.

When it closed, the sound just rang in my ear because now I was alone with these people and there were no witnesses. "You should go get dressed Henry because you're going to be spending the next week with your grandmother." Mom kissed my cheek before walking into the kitchen, Ma following behind her laughing.

Grandma Cora got up from the couch as well, "We're going to have so much _fun_. Emphasis on the 'fun' part." I wanted to melt into the floor right then and there. Just turn into a puddle.


End file.
